Toby, Dave & Ian Explain XKCD

Fuck this I’m done.

Wed, 10 Nov 2010 00:32:31 -0500

Fuck this I’m done.

Here’s a Computer Science geek-recognition comic strip for...

Mon, 08 Nov 2010 20:44:59 -0500

Here’s a Computer Science geek-recognition comic strip for that particular sub-set of readers.

By disproving basic logic, the building block of many core concepts in Computer Science, the highly talented female in this strip is able to discover numerous errors in Donald E. Knuth’s The Art of Computer Programming. Knuth offers a reward of $2.56 for each error found in his book, which would entitle the female to a large quantity of money.

There is not a joke here, just a reference to a piece of pop-geek-culture that will make a small set of people feel some amount of self worth.

A graph and common scientific knowledge are used to describe a...

Sat, 06 Nov 2010 14:51:52 -0400

A graph and common scientific knowledge are used to describe a standard pastime for people who sit in front of a keyboard for a majority of their day.

This comic is meant to make alone people feel like they are a part of something larger then themselves. It is meant to give them a brief sense of fulfillment before they die.

Today is the day the Author finally discovered a metaphor that...

Wed, 03 Nov 2010 18:35:50 -0400

Today is the day the Author finally discovered a metaphor that perfectly combines his two greatest passions in life: technology and unidirectional relationships wherein a female is able to completely dominate him emotionally. That metaphor is the diode - a device which only allows current (or emotional subservience) to flow in one direction (from male to female).

Truly stunning.

An unnecessary single-axis chart is used to make five geek...

Mon, 01 Nov 2010 13:53:00 -0400

An unnecessary single-axis chart is used to make five geek and/or child-nostalgia references into faux clichéd movie one-liners for use as a comic strip on the internet.

Some may find themselves wondering: is there a legal way to commit suicide?

Two people attempt to break glass by sining a high-pitch tone....

Fri, 29 Oct 2010 18:12:09 -0400

Two people attempt to break glass by sining a high-pitch tone. Instead, wackily, the glass fills with blood. An anthropomorphized “Physics” then admits she is attempting to stop humans from finding the Higgs Boson - a particle whose discovery would explain much of the inexplicable aspects of modern physics.

This comic serves only as a medium to make a reference to a pop-culture physics concept.

A man and a female enjoy the night’s stars together. They...

Wed, 27 Oct 2010 01:12:00 -0400

A man and a female enjoy the night’s stars together. They discuss a scientific fact about starlight, then the man then fetches a mirror and holds it up above him. He did this because he naively believes that the light of the stars will bounce back to their homes, which would make him feel less guilty about being alive.

Later she will probably talk about astronomy while he does oral sex on her.

Note: this comic is only relevant to those who spend a majority...

Mon, 25 Oct 2010 01:08:58 -0400

Note: this comic is only relevant to those who spend a majority of their time on social news websites such as reddit.com.

The Author is proposing a new system for detecting and blocking automated form submissions, also known as a captcha. These systems typically test the submitter for human qualities and abilities such as being able to read distorted text or pick an object from a series of images. These tests are easy for humans, but hard for a computer. In the Author’s system, the test is to compose an internet comment that is constructive and positive. The end result of this, the Author hopes, is to force those that create and operate the bots to give them the ability to generate nice, helpful comments.

The more astute Reader will realize the true meaning of today’s comic: the Author is using his vast influence to encourage smart engineers around the world to create computer software that will talk nicely to him.

For those of you who are unaware of the Los Alamos National...

Fri, 22 Oct 2010 14:13:57 -0400

For those of you who are unaware of the Los Alamos National Laboratory (possibly due to a lack of feigned-interest in the sciences), it is a very large, multidisciplinary technology and science research center in New Mexico.

The Author is telling a joke about a man who works in Los Alamos and is also not very good at science. The man is making grandiose, possibly devastating plans when it is revealed that he does not have knowledge of the most basic trigonometry (a mnemonic for remembering the properties of a triangle).

In humor, this device is called “absurdism” and can sometimes make people laugh.

The point of this web comic strip is to compare relativity and...

Wed, 20 Oct 2010 01:16:35 -0400

The point of this web comic strip is to compare relativity and quantum electrodynamics with a series of “crazy phenomenons” in an by the Author to further state his belief that science is magical. This is a common theme, and will not surprise anyone.

If the Author had a more fitting, long-form venue by which to state his opinions he would do so. But, as it turns out, he only has this web comic. For this reason (and this reason alone) he is forced to fabricate a hand-drawn “info-graphic” or set of tabular data by which to make his voice heard.

The poor Author weeps alone tonight.

Something tragic has happened in the Author’s life, and we...

Mon, 18 Oct 2010 14:54:36 -0400

Something tragic has happened in the Author’s life, and we feel that pointing out his love-life’s shortcomings or his relentless obsession with childhood would not be appropriate at this time.

The Author dreams of a world where he is accepted into an elite...

Fri, 15 Oct 2010 13:35:25 -0400

The Author dreams of a world where he is accepted into an elite club of geeks that promises to make it easier for him to completely avoid speaking to non-geeks.

Variations on the Guns N Roses song “Paradise City”...

Wed, 13 Oct 2010 11:50:36 -0400

Variations on the Guns N Roses song “Paradise City” are made here by using different rhyme combinations.

It is October, so three Halloween-themed jokes are made here....

Mon, 11 Oct 2010 16:01:35 -0400

It is October, so three Halloween-themed jokes are made here. All three revolve around a wacky misinterpretation of the tradition of pumpkin carving.

1. He carved a pumpkin into a pumpkin, a meta joke.

2. Nitro glycerin is used both as an explosive, and a treatment for heart conditions such as angina.

3. The woman is projecting her own insecurities about adulthood onto the pumpkin. It is assumed that this character represents the Author.

4. A reference to the Banach–Tarski paradox - a paradox that states a 3d ball can be split into pieces and reconstructed into two identical copies of the first ball. It is built upon The Axiom of Choice is an often-debated axiom dealing with infinite sets and recursion. Except in this case the ball is a pumpkin.

The Author is rallying against educators that fail to embrace...

Fri, 08 Oct 2010 13:17:07 -0400

The Author is rallying against educators that fail to embrace the student’s imagination and creativity, instead choosing to take the easy route and stick to a lesson plan.

The theory being taught in this hypothetical classroom is only partially correct, and does not apply to all modes of flight - especially for planes that are capable of upside-down flight.

An updated version of the Map of Online Communities - a...

Wed, 06 Oct 2010 01:18:45 -0400

An updated version of the Map of Online Communities - a visualization of the size and relationships between various web communities.

This otherwise useless data is visualized as a map for a good reason. It is meant to convince those that spend a majority of their lives online that the communities they belong to actually matter, like actual geographic locations. It is meant to give meaning to otherwise meaningless lives.

This comic is playing off of the concept of a “golden...

Tue, 05 Oct 2010 00:13:16 -0400

This comic is playing off of the concept of a “golden hammer” - a phrase used to describe a single tool or utility that someone uses in every possible situation, even if it is not the best tool for the job. It is is often expanded to state, “when all you have is a hammer, everything starts to look like a nail”, meaning that you will inevitably use your “hammer” for something it is not suited for.

The sitting-down man remarks in amazement that a small hardware device he is “hacking” on apparently runs the Java Virtual Machine - a large and complex piece of computer software used to, among other things, interpret and execute Java code. This is surprising to the man as this would be a very difficult and time-consuming task, and ultimately (in his opinion) unnecessary. He unknowingly is attributing the golden hammer effect to the device’s manufacturer by noticing that they have gone terribly out of their way to allow the use of their chosen hammer - Java.

The hatted man then walks in and replaces “hammer” and “something it is not suited for” in the aforementioned phrase with other words that the Author deemed more wacky and humorous. Another example of this could be: “when all you have is a ball-point pen, everything starts to look like a stick figure.”

In a hypothetical dream, a female imagines a world wherein all...

Fri, 01 Oct 2010 02:53:30 -0400

In a hypothetical dream, a female imagines a world wherein all the followers of modern dating manuals pair up and remove themselves from the dating pool.

Thankfully, the act of befriending the person you desire and slowly chipping away at their defenses through endless compassion and favors, hoping to one day make sex to them would still be allowed.

Stephen Hawking, renowned physicist and author, suggests to some...

Wed, 29 Sep 2010 16:28:03 -0400

Stephen Hawking, renowned physicist and author, suggests to some colleagues that they go as a group to see a movie. Due to his prolific insight and track record of groundbreaking discoveries, the colleagues mistake this suggestion for another piece of knowledge and quickly run off to alert the media.

For this reason, a violently crippled man sits alone. He sits, as he must, with no friends or loved ones with which he can share his most basic of emotions.

The Author, much like Stephen Hawking, creates comics such as these as a cry for help. A cry that will, sadly, never be heard over the cackling laughter of his devoted fans.

When people use a word such as “piquant”, typically...

Mon, 27 Sep 2010 16:16:04 -0400

When people use a word such as “piquant”, typically reserved for intellectual conversation, in combination with a vulgar curse word it creates a contrast that some may find humorous. This contrast is rarely seen, as the combination of these types of words is not common.

The Author has created a chart in order to make light of this humorous observation.